1. PLEASURE PRINCIPLE-- All people always act in ways intended to bring less pain and more pleasure.      

2.    During the first five years of a child’s life parents are almost totally in charge of the consequences of their child’s behavior.  Behavior that brings negative consequences tends to get discontinued while behavior that brings positive consequences tends to be repeated.

3.    Disciplined parents responding thoughtfully to their children’s behavior are able to shape that behavior.

4.    Parental inconsistency, lack of parental teamwork and emotion based reactive behavior undermine attempts at getting compliant behavior.

5.    It is as important to teach children how to think as it is to teach how to act!  For instance,    “This is too hard.  I’m stupid!”  could become “ This is challenging so  I will ask for help!”

6.    Children focus on relatively short-term goals.  Adults can focus on short term or long term goals.  As we age and gain in wisdom, our choices reflect greater maturity.

7.    Although we aren’t in charge of what the world brings us, we are in charge of how we respond to what the world brings us.  Such responses can be informed choices or automatic reactions.  This is very important!

8.    Parental responses to misbehavior that do not uphold the child’s basic sense of value and worth will not lead to healthy future behavior!

9.    Behaviors that enhance the quality of life get repeated.  That’s healthy human nature.